Thursday, June 13, 2019

Oiling your own wheel is the need for the hour

Few days back, I was talking to a darling friend of mine. She has been my buddy since the last couple of years and we have tuned up better than Marconi’s radio. Without any sieve between us, we have shared each other’s life and moments in a very beautiful as well as supportive way! There has never been a time in our lives when we have not stood by each other.

In one liner, she is a darling to me.
On that day, we were discussing about our career goals. She is going through a phase where she wants her lover to appear for a particular exam, which she will also be appearing for. I asked her to encourage him to appear and do well for the exam, since both of their future will be dependent on that exam.

To my dismay, she said she is trying her best to convince him to do well in that particular exam, but on the other hand he is encouraging her to do well in the exam, rather than taking the onus on himself. It is when a thought struck me.


Image result for expectations

Why is it easy for people to expect from others but not from themselves?




We are stuck in this oasis where people keep burdening us with expectations. Whether in the form of parents, teachers, lovers or peer pressure, we are always tied down by expectations. The problem is we don’t want to take up the responsibility of our own actions. We are too unsure of our own success, so we can put the onus of the entire system to be successful, on the other wheel.

For every relationship, the system works in the form of a cart. Two people try to drag the relationship by making their moves, taking relevant steps and being jubilant enough to walk that extra mile.

In cases where only one of the partner is making serious efforts, crack start to appear in the relationships. It has been observed that cheating in relations is a big outcome which doesn’t occur once in a blue moon, but is a cumulative aggregation of lacuna in efforts to maintain the relationship.

For the guy, it is very easy to give up the responsibilities of the relationship and put the onus of expectations on his better half. How many times have we wondered the contribution made by a woman in a particular relationship? Even from ignoring our smallest fits of rage to arguments over biggest matters, all I have seen is women forgiving the guy so that the relationship could be given one more chance!

What doesn’t actually get me is the failure of guys to acknowledge the value of the woman he has, when he has her and later crib for her when she is gone! Right now, it is high time for the dudes out there to shift from building six-pack abs to building six-point rules for their relationships to sustain. Time has come to oil your own wheel and not throw the towel on your better half.


1. A simple ‘How was your day?’ will work wonders.
2. Taking her out on a dinner, movie night once in a week will be a great relief to her.
3. Keeping the jealousy in check and encouraging her to take bold decisions in her career is the best gift you can ever give her! A financially independent woman is a blessing! Trust me!
4. Helping her with the dishes and household chores won’t reduce your manhood.
5. Listen to her advice. Personally, I felt the advice of your better half is more realistic, practical and stands the test of time.
6. Remember her parent’s birthday, even if you forget hers.


Image result for husband washing dishes

Relationship Goals!


Lastly, I would like to end by saying; there is no perfect relationship in this world. Neither is my parent’s nor is yours. The beauty of every relationship is the effort both of us make to make it an idealistic one and this is what all the fun is about!

P.S: NEVER reject a gift from your girlfriend. The smile you have one your face when she hands it over to you, encourages her to go to work on Monday! Always accept it with a open hand!

P.P.S: A kiss on her forehead before she goes to work will refresh her more than the smell of the jasmine

3 comments: